stuff UVA people like

1. Not wearing pants.
    a. This includes wearing leggings with nothing to cover their donks: i.e. wearing leggings with no sweatshirt, over-sized t-shirt, skirt, dress, SOMETHING with which to cover that which needs not be seen by me. Or anyone else.
    b. This also includes wearing shorts. In 42 degree F weather. 
 which leads me to...
2. Not wearing things that make sense in general.
Can someone just please explain to me WHO the ham sandwich told these UVA girls that it's ok to wear booty shorts--I'm talking about scraps of material that look like something originally intended to be a belt--in the freezing cold?! I mean, if you're trying to do your thing at the beach in the summer, then I really can't judge. BUT SERIOUSLY. If it's cold enough to wear UGG boots/rain boots with that same gray sweatshirt with the navy blue lettering saying "VIRGINIA" on it, then it's cold enough to FREAKIN COVER YOUR LEGS. I don't need to see that. 


3. Not wearing things at all. Because nothing says, "I'm a responsible individual!" like streaking where old ladies and children can see you in all your glory. 

4. To abbrevs stuff. "I was gonna go to the AFC before going to the Pav, but then I realized I was running late for my meeting with my SR. So I totes had to cut through the IRC, but then I bumped into my PA, and we talked forever, so I took the NL back to central grounds." <--HUH?!


5. To make an infernal racket outside my house at 1:00 in the morning. TAKE YOUR JIGGY KRUNK SOMEWHERE ELSE


6. Vegan cookies. This I simply will not understand. It's like trying to eat a tree. A very small tree.


7. The North Face. As opposed to the South Butt...?


8. Winning football games. Because it means something when we do. 


9. Dance parties. <--This is acceptable. Except when it involves #5.

10. Doing trifling things at the dining hall. Like pouring chocolate milk on your Lucky Charms. <--Seriously. I saw this happen. I couldn't make this stuff up if I tried. 


10. Studying abroad. Everyone must study abroad, that way there's never anyone in Charlottesville. It's what Jefferson would have wanted, anyway.
speaking of which...
11. Thomas Jefferson. 


The Moral of the Story: WahooWhat...?


Disclaimer: I love the student body of UVA like crazy. And I love UVA in general. So I can sass it if I want.